Friday, April 20, 2012

The Slow Dream

In a recent post, I shared one of my tactics for slowing the vigorous march of time.   This idea that time can be flexible is intriguing.  I wonder: is time like putty, a medium we have the power to manipulate?  Is it not what we thought it was?  Perhaps those old spreadsheet time management tools can be thrown out the window for good. This question is still fresh in my mind as I work on a secret project for a special someone who has no idea who I am. While I work, I'm newly aware of something so important that it's difficult to express.  I feel like a person who has just come a little farther out of a dark cave and into some very bright sunlight.

The slow dream is the one you remember on waking.

I am building a slow dream.  When I wake up in the bright sunlight I can see that I have two healthy children, a healthy husband...and I even have healthy pets!  That miracle alone is enough to send my heart soaring.  Every day we spend like this is incredibly precious and wonderful.  So it does not matter to me that when I work, I have interruptions and difficulty finishing a simple project in a short period of time.  It might take three days to finish because in the meantime, we're doing school, shopping for food, cleaning the house, caring for friends, caring for pets and having surprising adventures.  Sometimes, we even go kayaking.

I admit that I have struggled with certain issues, like Elliot's progress in regular school.  From my perspective now, that issue seems like such an insignificant thing to worry about.  Last night, I heard Delilah's call to "slow down and love someone" on the radio and I knew without doubt that Richard and I had made the right decision to bring Elliot home for his education.  We can slow down and love him, and build his foundation for learning, nearly every hour of every day if he needs it. 

The call to slow down and love someone also applies to the little home business.  I can slow down and love it too.  Slow dreams take a long time and a lot of care and patience.  I could save money and ship my idea off to a manufacturer in China, but it's just not my style.

 And so I might have started a small project several days ago, only to have to put it down because we need to talk about how the word "could" sounds like it should be spelled "cud," but cud is something a cow chews, and could is not even a thing, but one way to ask a question.  I love that I can discuss language, books, science, math and art with my son while we go though this life together.  I enjoy watching him take a play break to go out and ride his scooter while the morning is in full swing, the sky full of light and the air fresh and dewy.  I love that he is free to explore and not stuck at a desk all day. Yesterday, during one of his explorations, he found a box of old stuff in a cabinet.  I asked him what he found inside the box and he replied

"my childhood."

The box contained a collection of old superhero costumes.


I told him that his daddy has a theory that we put memories in physical objects, and that's why when you touch something you used to play with, a memory will surface. With that thought, he went back to the box to look for his old blanket. 

What is your relationship with time?  Do you have tools that you use to manipulate it?  When you want to remember something, are you able to store it somewhere or expand your experience of it in some way?








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