As a family we are standing on the cliff of a decision so huge that it makes me question whether or not it is good to be completely and utterly attached to the way I've been living.
Today, this scripture appeared to give me comfort:
"I know well the plans I have in mind for you, says the Lord, plans for your welfare, not for woe! Plans to give you a future full of hope. When you call me, when you go to pray to me, I will listen to you. When you look for me, you will find me." ---Jeremiah 29: 11-12
When I am able to reveal more of these plans, I look forward to sharing the details. For now I must stay quiet as a mouse and keep moving forward with our daily routine. I've discovered that sewing is helping me to stay centered and at peace. Sewing and rock music. And going outside to play.
One of the greatest gifts in life is the gift of my family. We've shared an incredible amount of challenges and change together. At the end of the day, I fall asleep happy and feeling good not because I have a beautiful home at the edge of a city, or a reliable vehicle, or a membership to the YMCA, or every other thing that makes up this American Dream.
I have the love of my life beside me.
To be in our relationship is to experience an abundant renewable source of love, meaning, purpose, joy and yes, sometimes frustration. Those frustrations have proven to be immunizations against apathy, boredom and complacency. I am challenged intellectually, spiritually, and even physically, as Richard takes me to mountain paths and guides through rocky riverbeds and past black bears.
He takes me to the top of giant sand dunes and encourages me to fly down them in a hang glider.
He believes in me and in us in our decision to take Elliot's education in our hands. Now I'm wondering at this very moment:
Are we going to be willing to completely let go and let God take us in His hands?
Or have we always been there, in those loving hands, only thinking that the to do list....which should really be titled the "to live" list.... was written in our handwriting alone.
While we stand here with our faith like hang gliders, waiting for a nice gentle thermal to lift us up, we appreciate your prayers or good intentions, and thank you for sending them our way.
This is so beautiful Jenny! So very, very beautiful. I will say a prayer for you today. Keep on sewing. Love, Becky
ReplyDeleteAWWW, thank you so much Becky!!! I would give you a giant hug if I were there in person.
ReplyDeleteJenny, Jer. 29:11 is one of my absolute favorite verses and one I prayed for you yesterday after our messages. You have what is most important (and you said it most beautifully)and any decision you make won't alter that.
ReplyDeleteJust like when you are hang gliding and you have to take that step of no return in order to move into higher places, making this decision, whatever way you go, is like that. You have unseen but ever present help on your side.
Love and hugs to you, my friend!
Dear Shelly, HOW awesome that you prayed that scripture for us and then as if by magic...which I am learning to recognize as God's unmistakable guidance... the words popped into my sight this morning from another friend who has no knowledge about the situation.
DeleteI am comfortable with taking a step off a sand dune, where there is a soft landing. I'm trying to comfort myself by imagining that the landing will still be soft even when the jump is being taken from the edge of a mountain top. HOW BRAVE can I be? I don't normally have to think about things like this!
So exciting!! I always am so nervous about any change for myself...always try to remember to relax and remember that change is good.. it makes up the roller coaster that is life. I look to this wonderful place I am in now and know I would not be here if it had not been for change :) My prayers and happy thoughts are with you and your family and I look forward to hearing so much more about this!
ReplyDeleteHi Michelle, I always love your visits here! Thanks for the encouragement. I'm usually not one to enjoy the roller coaster part of life. But then again, we are all spinning around on a great big rock in space, traveling around a sun, taking a giant ride through the cosmos. Life is moving all the time, I just forget to notice during normal routine that it changes constantly.
DeleteHi Jenny. Gosh, this all sounds very exciting I must say. A beautifully written post, as always. I know that God will guide you to do the right thing. You are lucky indeed to be with a man who has such faith in you,and who is always ready to to encourage you. Good luck my friend.
ReplyDeleteHi Thisisme, thank you for the support my dear friend! When Richard showed up in my life, things really got interesting. Challenging and fun and frustrating and really absolutely wonderful.
DeleteHow absolutely exciting and invigorating to be on the brink of something so... full, it sounds! Trusting. Man, that is the hard part :) Thinking of you!
ReplyDeleteHi Corinne, thanks for stopping by! I've given trust to people that I should not have trusted, but every time I trusted God, it worked out. That is the absolute best way to help me navigate this new situation. Thank you for reminding me!
DeleteChange can be so scary but the result is often wonderful beyond our wildest expectations. I will be keeping your family in my thoughts and prayers. Your relationship with Richard and the love you share with your family is a beautiful thing to read about. Unconditional love is truly the greatest gift any of us could ever receive. Visiting your blog always does my heart good.
ReplyDeleteHi Jenn! Thank you so much for the good thoughts and the prayers. I normally don't think to ask for help like this, but I'm so glad I did. The problem with potential change is that sometimes it feels like a never ending void, when really it's a never ending experience of difference. Growing up in our little town in Michigan gave me such comfort and happiness that I thought I would never leave. It was a little green valley that in the spring reminds me of Ireland or the Hobbit's Shire. My mom still has the house there, and nothing has changed. You can look out and see raspberry fields and smell the dairy farm down the road. I miss that place so much it hurts. And my childhood. But there was another plan, which included a daughter and a son and meeting the love of my life. I would follow him to the end of the earth, if you know what I mean:)
DeleteI've been thinking about you all day and am excited to hear about what's coming your way. Change is a little nerve wracking, but also invigorating. It's good to have a little shakeup every so often. I listen to music too to keep me centered.
ReplyDeleteKaren I am INDEED shook up. I can't wait to tell you more. Thank you for thinking of me, that really touches my heart! I think of you often too! There's a part of me that takes a little mental flight to California and it's so awesome to know that I have a good friend there.
DeleteChange is scary, change is exciting, change is oftentimes necessary. I wish you all the best as you make the decisions and the transitions.
ReplyDeleteThis is the part that compelled me to comment ... it makes me unexpectedly happy and I thank you for the image: "I've discovered that sewing is helping me to stay centered and at peace. Sewing and rock music."
Hi Elle, what a joyful surprise to know you came by today. It has been my saving grace! I'm listening to Quadrophenia by the Who, and North by Matchbox Twenty. I found an old stereo on a scavenging foray and it makes life better.
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